On Showing Yourself
Photo by: Jean-Guy de La Casinière
What if our lessons aren’t only for us?
Those wounds that run deep, you know the ones you flinch away from, what if they are your personal work as a part of our collective evolution?
Remember that relationship or accident or failure that really messed you up, well what if it happened to for you so you could carry its message to the light? Maybe you are the best human on Earth to process that particular experience and share it with the world. It’s a little easier to bare being face down in the muck of your pain when you know that it’s not just for you. It’s a little easier to trust the whispers of your soul over the convenience of self-denial when you know that you are not alone.
That’s what got me thinking, maybe my lessons aren’t just for me. If I thought that ‘my healing’ was only for me, I may not have even peaked into the murky swamp of ‘my story’. If walking through my pain and shame were only to make me feel better, I may not have dared to go there. But something in me knew that all the work we do individually ripples out to heal all of humanity and that was enough motivation to take the plunge.
I held back on sharing my struggles for a long time. I had so many reasons for not reaching out and opening up about various things. I convinced myself that it was better to “protect” everyone else from my shadow side, that darker part of me that really was no good. So I chose a back seat in the audience and watched in horror as shame and fear pranced me around like a puppet. That’s when I started to find my voice again. At first I cautiously spilled it all out to my journal and then a little more to the mirror and then to my animal friends and then I approached the daunting humans 😉
I am not saying that you need to tell everyone who will listen about what is going on in your inner world. You will know when something is worth sharing and you will feel when fear tries to shut you down. This isn’t just about trauma, it could be you know, the little things that you feel are ‘silly’ or ‘nothing’ and yet they weigh you down. I’m just saying that it’s worth it when you do decide to speak up for yourself and the rest of us.
When you are ready to get a little vulnerable, maybe you can reach out to a friend, an energy worker, a healer, a therapist, a mentor or a sibling; someone who has done a deep dive into their own work and is still willing to go deeper. Once you are a little more practiced at sitting in the hot seat of vulnerability you can begin to share your ordinary struggles with your students or your coworkers, relating as one ordinary, beautiful and fantastic human to another. Vulnerability is a true strength. The courage in speaking out is enough to begin to dissolve the walls of shame. I know from my own experience that armour made out of fear is heavy and fragile.
Sharing what is sitting heavily with you feels as good as skinny dipping. I say, get naked and dive in.
Have you shared some tender stuff? I would love to know, how did you first open up about it? Do you still allow yourself to speak up about your pain?
I Love You